Just for Dads ~ October 2019

As I explained in my June blog, I’m a dance dad. The defined duties of a dance dad are to drive, pay, and clap. The reality show, “Dance Moms,” seems to indicate that the duty of a dance mom is to be a complete nutcase. The dance teacher on the show, Abby Lee Miller, is a wheelchair-bound, ex-convict who screams at both children and parents like a wild banshee. I asked my daughter and wife why anybody would want to be a part of that show? They both said people pursuing personal goals will put up with almost anything to have an audience with this well-known dance teacher and perform at shows where people are watching. Attention is a powerful force. People want it, have always wanted it, and will want it in the future.

I think as parents we must have discernment on who we allow our children to have an audience with or be influenced by. There will be teachers, coaches, or church leaders who can make positive life-changing impacts on our kids. Some adults will leave little to no impact, but some can have negative impacts. They might be selfish, or just not helpful in assisting our children accomplish goals or having positive experiences.

If you have ever listened to conversations at little league games, dance recitals, parent social media pages, etc., you will notice that we, as parents, can get our priorities way out of line. Don’t lose sight of what you are supposed to do. We are to be the best and most effective audience for our kids because we love them, have a long-term view of what is best for them, and are going to love them regardless of the size of the crowds who watch them.

Ward Williams is the founder and executive director of Vineyard Family Services. Contact him at ward@vfsdads.com.

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